Conclusion

Without Concern for results, perform the necessary action; surrendering all attachments, accomplish life's highest good. -- Bhagavad Gita

So we are at the end of the process for this program. I'm not at the end of my yoga journey by any means. I learned that in the times that I let things happen and didn't force or over think them, they had a better flow. When I didn't worry about the details or the perceptions of others, I was more in tune with my true self. And really, that is what this journey is all about. Only one person can walk in my shoes at a time.

My recommendation to students that may be new to yoga and interested in pursuing life as a yogi would be to follow their heart. It will lead them in the right direction. The right direction for them may not be the road everyone else traveled. There is no one absolute correct way to be a yogi.

If you have found peace in your heart, have a deeper appreciation for the human condition and understand that the only thing constant in the world is change, then you may be on the road to being a yogi.

Every day will not be easy. But with the tools of pranayama, asana, meditation and stillness, you will be able to get through the toughest times with grace.

Working with Injury

Lack of true knowledge is the source of all pains and sorrows. -- Yoga Sutra 2:24

To study yoga is to take a course in studying yourself. As we approach the end of the program, I'm noticing how my asana practice has changed as I've progressed in my breathing practice meditation. I like to take the classes more slowly. I'm not as rushed to jump into poses. I linger in poses that I enjoy or provide more stretch. I concentrate more on the poses that cause me discomfort or uneasiness.

I noticed in the last week or so that a nagging soreness in my knee has been flaring up a bit more that usual as well. I noticed that my alignment in my hips has been off more than usual and that could be causing my issue. It feels a little like I have a sick child with me that I must attend to while still practicing my asana and breath practices. Being ever mindful to take it easy on the sore knee while making sure the rest of the family (limbs) gets what they need.

While focusing on other things, I let my alignment go. I need to reconnect with my asana to maintain a safe practice and healthy body to better be able to progress in in my other practices.

So now I'm looking at my practice a little differently again. To make sure not to cause further injury of the knee and to assist in it's rehab while still being present through all the asana I'm practicing.

My teacher said last night in class: "In yoga there is no destination, just a continuous circle." So perhaps I'm circling around back to beginner status again to learn what I forgot or didn't catch the last few times around.

Finding Peace Around Chaos

Meditation practice is regarded as a good and in fact excellent way to overcome warfare in the world: our own warfare as well as greater warfare. - Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche

Last week I felt myself get very affected by the continuous news of the protests and unrest in Egypt. From listening to it on the news in the car as I traveled to and from work, to it being on TV when I got home. You'd think because scenes like these are shown on the news frequently, not to mention on drama shows and such, that I'd be numb to it and not phased by it. This time for some reason, maybe because it did seem to be on 24/7 or it was in the way the stories were told, it upset me greatly. I became very upset by the stories and the visuals. I noticed my mood change. I became more agitated and uneasy. It made me quite nervous. I even noticed that I interacted with others in a more distant way.

As soon as I was able to identify what was making me feel this way, I turned to my meditation and breathing practice to find some quiet. I decided that although it is important to stay up to date with the news of the day, I didn't need to hear about it at every turn. When I was in my car, I started to play more music. At home I turned off the TV or walked away if my husband wanted to continue watching.

Meditation and pranayama truly helped to calm me down and refocus my energies to more positive and more productive things. By the end of the week, I spent more of my practice time sending thoughts and peaceful energy to those areas in the world where there is unrest. Maybe if more of us are able to pool our resources of breath and positive energy, we can change the momentum there. It only takes a small pebble in the water to create a large ripple effect. Imagine what many pebbles can do. Maybe we can start a tidal wave of good energy going to all the troubled regions to make changes for the better.

Self Study

It is called the witness, the consenter, the sustainer, the enjoyer, the great lord, and the highest Self, the supreme Person in this body. -- Bhagavad Gita

The entire 300hr program can be considered a practice in svadhyaya as we all are asked to look inward and examine our practice, and what drives us to be teachers.

This week I spent more time thinking about this journey and program. It helped me to better understand why I'm pursuing this vocation. It is more of a calling than just a career opportunity after all.

I realized that I'm learning much more from working with people than I ever thought I would. I used to work at a desk programming code for a living and thought that was how I would earn a living the rest of my life. At one time I enjoyed the work because it kept me away from people and I could be introverted, not bothered and would find my own peace in that. It got old and unfullfilling and very lonely. I begain to feel like I wasn't doing enough for the world or making the world a better place.

Since I've been working with people in my teaching I've found that they are giving me so much more than I feel like I'm giving them. I tell people that when we are in class, I'm the facilitator. They will get out of the class whatever they put into it. The feedback in how they approach the class is amazing! I'm giving cues but they are responding with energy from places I don't know where! That's how I know this is a calling

I sat down last after my last day at a studio that was closing and thought about what my next steps are. Where will I go, what do I want to do, how will I go about doing whatever that is? I don't have all the answers to these questions yet. I've decided to let the universe take me where it wants. We'll see where it leads. I need to go with the flow right now and see who I will practice with and who will teach me on that road.

The Practice of Compassion

Cleanliness of the body and mind develops disinterest in the contact with other for self-gratification. Yoga Sutra 2:40

Working with the niyama sauca, I'm reminded of my path to cleaning the body and the mind. Through this process, I've been working on all the aspects of my life. Cleaning my home, my thoughts, my actions and my body. I'm more aware of what I eat and why I eat it. I've been struggling however, with the aspect of becoming a vegetarian. Remember that midwestern girl that started this trek a few months back? She wasn't a big veggie eater. Still not as it turns out.

Like I said I'm much more conscious about what I am eating, given up fast foods for the most part, check all labels when grocery shopping. I buy only whole foods, organic and check sugar, salt and chemical content of everything I buy.

I've got numerous new recipes for vegetarian dishes, but still haven't made them. I somehow always forget the ingredients on my list on shopping days.

Thinking about this makes me anxious and worry that I'm not fulfilling my mission in this project if I don't successfully become a vegetarian before this course is complete.

I was reminded by my mentor that perhaps it's not everyone's mission to become a vegetarian. She recommended that I practice ahimsa by not beating myself up over this and with that I may find some contentment.

In the book Meditations from the Mat they say: "Sauca is not about what we eat but about the cleanliness of our choices. Sauca's contribution is the practice of compassion. It it the observance of loving-kindness in thought."

Once I was released from my burden of worry about when and if I'll become a vegetarian, I relaxed and decided to allow the universe to decide when it will happen. It may not be before this course is finished, but it may still happen.

As a result, I printed out the list of goodies to get for vegetarian living and took it to the store when we shopped over the weekend. Turns out the store we went to didn't carry any of the items I was interested in. Baby steps!

Effortless Attention

He should lift up the self by the Self. -- Bhagavad Gita

Last week seemed like a whirlwind of activity for me. Work became very busy. It felt as though I wasn't spending enough time on the mat and focusing on my yoga experiences.

To back things up a bit, I found out a few weeks ago that a studio I work at is closing at the end of the month and I started asking clients if they wanted to continue to work with me and if they had interest in doing so at my home studio that my husband and I have been working on. Last week many of those people finished their commitment with that studio and started inquiring about working with me privately and setting up appointments. Some of those people started referring their friends and telling me their stories. I gladly took the reservations, set appointments and listened to stories.

In the book: Meditations from the Mat, Gates and Kenison describe Dyana as being "our lives are imbued by divine energy" We move from dharana and dyana in a flowing way.  They say:

Whatever work or relationships may come our way, they are transformed by the grace that flows through us. Our own experience of being in the world is one of ever increasing peace, clarity, understanding, and ability. We are no longer acting solely on our own behalf, rather, we have become channels for grace.

I'm not sure I feel worthy of such deep thought, and I know I'm trying to start a small business. When I found out the studio was closing rather unexpectedly, I felt bad for the people I've been working with that were coming to classes that were more affordable than privates and have restrictions that keep them from traveling longer distances to try other studios. I'm honored that they will allow me to continue to work with them. And I do hope I'm able to help improve their lives in some small way.

Last week started with me just wondering when I'd get on the mat, what I'd be doing for this posting and how I would live more a yogic life. Perhaps by just letting go, being available for others and being at peace with all of it was yoga for the week.

Remembering my Intention

Also through cleanliness and purity of body and mind (shaucha) comes a purification of the subtle mental essence (sattva), a pleasantness, goodness and gladness of feeling, a one-pointedness with intentness, the conquest or mastery over the senses, and a fitness, qualification, or capability for self-realization. -- Yoga Sutra 2:41

After a month of excess and poor health, its time to renew my intention toward the yogic lifestyle. As the sutras say, to purify the mind, one must start with the body. So this week we went through the cupboards and cleaned out the remaining unhealthy food left uneaten and replaced it with healthy natural foods. We started eating more greens and fibers to help wash away all the sweets and fatty foods we ate over the holidays.

It's always amazing how quickly the changes happen and how equally quickly the body feels better. When the body feels better, healthier and has more energy, the mind feels free and clear.

Eating better makes me want to be more active. It pulls me away from a stationary life in front of a TV. An easy life to live, just not very fulfilling.

Moving around more, eating better and having a clear mind, reminds my that my true intention in life is to work to help other feel better. It re-energizes me to serve that purpose in  a more committed way.

It's not a resolution, it's renewal of intention. Sometimes we need a little reminder of what we wanted to to and be when we grow up. Luckily, that's why there are holidays and a new year to get us back on track.